As my peers and I age into our 30s, it is becoming more and more apparent that my parents and those of their age group were a pretty smart bunch.
You see, in high school and college I was skeptical that the hard work and sacrifice of getting an education and devoting time to my job would pay off. There were other things that I would have rather been doing (sleeping, fishing, surfing, etc.). I envied those who were carefree and "partied it up" through those years. My father would tell me what I was doing was creating windows of opportunity for myself. He would say that good luck comes to the person who is prepared when an opportunity arises. If I were not prepared, my opportunities would be limited in the future.
Although not applicable to everyone, I've seen how the lack of preparation by my peers have left some of them with very few options to succeed. This becomes compounded as we get older and the realities of life start to take over (children, mortgage, etc.).
It is my belief that these individuals did not have a plan for success nor did they realize that their windows of opportunity were only going to be as vast as they wanted it to be.
Please understand that I worked the party scene as well, but it did not become a daily routine. Furthermore, my opinion is that a college degree is not a guarantee for success. It is merely a tool that a person with a desire for success can utilize.
Of course, there are many roads to success. This month I thought I'd share some of what was taught to me so early on in life. The good news is that no matter how old you are, many windows can be opened for you if you so desire.
1. DEFINE SUCCESS (SET A PRIORITY LIST)
One of my favorite TV shows (yes, I sometimes watch TV) is the VH1 documentary series "Behind the Music." This show documents the rise (and most often fall) of some of America's greatest musicians. One thing that all the artists featured on this show have in common is that they became wildly successful in their field. They did so because success was clear to them. Success in their mind meant:
1) Signing a record deal with a major record label.
2) Making millions of dollars
3) Having a lot of _______________ Insert destructive lifestyle pattern here (drugs, alcohol, women/men, etc.)
Your definition of success may not look like theirs, but if you have never sat down to think about what success means to you, then it's probable you will never get there. Take some time to truly reflect on what is important to you and what your priorities are. Some of my definitions of success are:
1) Being a good husband/son
2) Being a good friend
3) Achieving financial freedom
4) Creating music I'm proud of
Knowing these definitions and prioritizing them makes decision making very easy. If I choose to spend all my time at work or on the road playing music then I'm neglecting priority #1 and #2. You will notice that achieving financial freedom is #3. I personally would rather have a happy wife than be rich. Your ranking may be different.
2. SET GOALS (WRITE THEM DOWN)
Now that success is defined, setting goals will help you to achieve greatness in these areas.
However, just saying "my goal is to lose 10 pounds," does not cut it. These goals need to be WRITTEN and put in a place where you will look at them every day.
Try to make your goals "quantifiable." In my priorities list #3 is achieving financial freedom. That's a great priority, but a goal would be more specific. For example:
I will put $4,000 a year into a Roth IRA and $12,000 a year into my stock portfolio.
An example for #1 is:
Take (wife/husband) out for dinner a minimum of 1 night a week. Turn off cell phone.
Writing down quantifiable goals will help you achieve high levels of success 10 times more than just thinking them in your brain.
Lastly, POST your goals somewhere where you will see them every day. I personally have my goals as my background on my desktop. Therefore, they pop up every time I turn on my PC.
3. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE SIMILAR IDEALS
In the 90s, although I didn't write it down, I had a clear goal of becoming a well-respected musician in the Hawaiian music community. That was one goal I did not have to write down because it was so inbred into my psyche it was all I could think about.
The band I performed with to achieve this goal was a trio. We had gone through many other band members. Some were very talented but they fell by the wayside because they did not share our common goal. When the original band parted ways in the year 2000, it was clear that our priorities and goals had changed as well.
When you surround yourself with people who are cheering you on and have a common sense of purpose/achievement, the momentum will catapult you to success. Every contrary person will be like a lead weight, pulling you down. Shed the weight and energize yourself.
4. FOCUS YOURSELF
A simple idea that works wonders is to go to bed 30 minutes earlier at night. During that time, take out your day planner, notebook, and plan your next day. Prioritize what needs to be done the minute you wake up. Get to the office 30 minutes early. Bang these out right away. Don't answer the phone or look at your e-mail. Getting this done will leave you energized and excited about the day ahead.
5. BE CONSCIOUS OF THE INVISIBLE BARRIER
In Allyson Lewis's book "The Seven Minute Difference" she speaks of the invisible barrier, or "the one-yard line." The analogy she uses is one of a football team who is able to push their way down field, only to be stopped at the one yard line.
There is always that stubborn love handle, or the one night you couldn't make it home early because of a disaster at work. Make sure you're aware of these situations and don't let them make you revert back to the old habits which will take you away from achieving your goal. Break through and score that touchdown!
6. HAVE THE DESIRE TO CHANGE
The only thing constant in life is change. Be sure to go back to your goals and re-assess them regularly.
Think of it like a golf game. Tiger Woods will take time to think about how he'll hit his drive. Once complete he will assess the situation, make the proper adjustments and hit again. He is constantly monitoring the wind, lie, club, and his swing to get him to the hole. Be Tiger.
COMMENTS:
I want to thank you all again for sending me e-mails (concurrence and critique) and leaving comments regarding the past columns.
With this column I knew that it would be impossible to cover EVERY step to success. Therefore, I would like to invite you (the reader) to leave your own tip in the comments section below.
Thanks.
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