Imagining what could have been, Neal Miyake photo
First there was that malady known as Song Stuck In Your Head Syndrome. Now, let's look at the phenomenon that I like to call Wish I Went Waves (or WIW Waves).
Like most of you out there, my surfing memories are made up of frame grabs of my waveriding experiences. Among many others, I remember being pushed into the whitewater at Brenneckes as a kid, that tuberide I had just before the wipeout that nearly broke my neck in high school, my first ride at small, messy Pipeline, and even my first stand up tube on a longboard at Kewalos.
However, some of the most memorable surfing experiences seared into my brain are of the critical waves throughout my life that I did not take off on. I have a running list in my head of these waves that, for one reason or another, "Neal wouldn't go."
The WIW phenomenon can even hit during contests, Neal Miyake photo
There is one WIW wave in particular that stands out above all the others (read it at Confidence Lost -- 12/29/96). Over a decade ago, I was jockeying with a competitive crowd out at Off the Wall. I was sitting slightly away from the pack when a sweet wave headed right for me. I was the furthest out with no one even close--the wave had my name written all over it. However, as I started stroking for it, it just walled up and looked unmakeable (or at least that is what my brain convinced my body). In any case, I hesitated and ended up pulling back. Sitting 15 yards inside of me was an Aussie bodyboarder who whipped around and went for it. I couldn't help myself and watched the entire ride from behind. Just before the wave shut down near the shoreline, he blasted over the top, slapping the water with glee. The lineup also watched things unfold, and just let out a collective "whoah!"
I felt so sick! I had the opportunity to catch an incredible ride, but in front of the entire lineup I chickened out. Lost any amount of confidence I had built up, and simultaneously dropped my lineup status back to Midwest tourist level. All shame.
I have several other notable WIW waves. I remember backing off on a wave out at Ehukai during an amateur bodyboarding contest because a young Kainoa McGee (15) barked that he was going (I shoulda took off and given him an interference). I also remember paddling for a late takeoff at decent-sized Laniakea, then hesitating at the last minute.
The point of no return, Neal Miyake photo
It's one thing to think you are going to get shacked in some double-overhead top-to-bottom grinder, but when you are actually there, staring down into the abyss or looking down the line an a seemingly unmakeable wave wall, that's when you show your true mettle.
Recently, surf photographer Brian Bielmann was one of the winners in the Red Bull Illume photo contest. His photo of Brian Pacheco's frustration of missing a wave is a prime example of WIW syndrome.
Maybe it's a combination of normal regret and 20/20 hindsight, but for me at least, the WIW Wave phenomenon is very real. I don't think I'll ever get over not taking off on those waves.
Of course for every WIW waves, there's an even greater number of Wish I Never Go (WING) waves.
WIW or WING--it's all about regret, Danny Black photo
Maybe William Shakespeare was right--Discretion is the better part of valor. But then again, I don't think William ever surfed.
Stay stoked!
